Hey, hey! Long time no speak, how are you all? I just wanted to pop by and say a quick hello. For those of you who aren’t aware, I’ve been quite unwell for the past few months 🙁
Sadly I’ve still got a lot going on with my health, both physically and mentally. I wanted to be fit and raring to go long before now, but unfortunately the universe had other ideas and I’m not there yet.
I wanted to say thank you for the lovely messages I’ve been sent – CK passed them all on to me. He’s been looking after the emails, website and social media for me. Getting ill completely derailed me, and to be honest I’ve not had the strength or capacity to even entertain being “Carnal Queen”. That hasn’t really changed yet either, but I wanted to tentatively (and metaphorically) show my face.
Huge, huge thanks to the companies who have been so fantastic in waiting for reviews from me. I’ve always made sure to get things done in a timely manner before, so I’m so sorry that you’re still waiting – I feel absolutely awful and like I’ve really let you down! It’s just not me, but I’ve had to do as I’m told, and for once, listen to my (failing) body.
Nevertheless, the guilt is weighing heavy on me, and I really want to get something on the website for everyone waiting. I’ve got my notes from where I left off – although it feels like a stranger wrote them now – but I’m hoping they will be of help. I will say straight away, I fully expect pieces to be lacking. Without going into detail, I’ll say that things aren’t exactly “working” for me at the moment. Sex quickly became a distant memory … and orgasms? What are they? ?
A sex blogger without functioning sexual organs is about as much use as a chocolate teapot, but I just want to get you some info up, along with links etc. I can always go back in and add to them in the future.
My medication has caused me many issues, including making me feel like I’m going to fall off the planet if I looked at any form of screen – screen sickness isn’t fun! I’ve also had trouble forming coherent thoughts, and I haven’t even been able to read books, because my stupid brain couldn’t retain the information from one paragraph to the next – those things are a lot better than they were though, so fingers crossed.
I think when I do feel able to dive back in, the journey will be an interesting one. It might be a case of focusing on the gentler, more sensual side of things, and hoping that the rest of it follows on from there. Mind you, who knows how things will pan out. I’ve quickly realised that trying to plan things around health is pointless, and often leads to added pressure and disappointment. I’ll get there at some point, I’m sure.
I also wanted to publicly thank CK. I’ve thanked him repeatedly throughout, but it never seems enough. Without him, I simply wouldn’t be here now, so I owe him everything. He’s seen me in states that you hope your partner never does, and he’s done things for me that I hoped he’d never have to do. I’m the worlds worst patient, and he’s been my absolute rock. Never complaining, always supportive and just amazing. He has the patience of a saint!
He was hoping to be able to get a couple of reviews up himself, but he’s been dealing with all the life stuff, other family member health issues, looking after the house and the animals … and all whilst tending to me, which in itself has been a full time job. I’ve no idea how he hasn’t clobbered me over the head and buried me under the patio to be honest!
Anyway, I know I’m rambling now because I’ve given myself a headache ? I’ll fire CK some random words in emails, let him piece them together, and we’ll hope for the best. It’s not enough, and I’m truly sorry for that, but I’m trying to make the best of a crap situation.
I’m going to get going now and leave you back in the capable hands of CK. All social media, emails etc will still be dealt with by him for the foreseeable – I know it won’t end well if I try to run before I can walk. Forwards, not backwards … and with a bit of luck if I can get myself back to good health, CQ will be back firing on all cylinders.
Once again, thanks for the well wishes, and I’m sorry things haven’t gone to plan.
(the artist formerly known as ?)