ROCKBOX Finger Review
By Carnal Queen.
“Oh dear, Oh dear, Oh dear … ” This ROCKBOX Finger might have actually made me chuckle, if it wasn’t so bad, and I’m not talking just a bit bad, I’m talking catastrophically bad …
I really wanted to like this toy. I’d followed its conception and development on ‘Frisky Business’ and I could definitely see its potential as a fully functioning sex toy, I could see the work and effort Lovehoney had put into getting it designed and manufactured. It’s been pretty badly slated by people who’ve tried it – I’ve said before that I try to avoid reading other peoples views until I’ve formed my own, but there was just no getting away from what people were saying about the finger. I’ve got the ROCKBOX 2, I ‘get’ the style of this brand of toys, and I was really hoping to find a redeeming feature … I failed, epically!
It comes packaged in keeping with the ROCKBOX brand theme, it’s industrial and power tool like. I quite like it, it’s different and makes the product stand out from other toys. Amusingly it has a ‘WARNING’ triangle on the box, for high vibration risk. I totally agree that the finger should come issued with a warning, but it’s not for high vibration risk!
It’s powered by 4 AAA batteries, and I don’t think I’ve ever expended so much bloody energy just trying to put batteries in something, by the time I’d finally got the battery cover off and got the batteries in, I didn’t feel like playing with a sex toy! You have to put pressure on a single point and pull the end off, which results in you thinking you’re going to break the finger before it’s even been introduced to your vulva! Why they’ve made it so difficult is beyond me, if it was waterproof then maybe, but it isn’t, so a simple screw cap would’ve sufficed!
It’s noisy. Like really noisy. I was expecting this, because the mains powered ROCKBOX is, but I don’t see why the finger has to be quite so loud – other super powerful sex toy manufacturers manage to create things that don’t need you to shout over it to be heard. I have no doubt that my slightly deaf neighbour could hear this hammering away. As for power, yeah it thrusts away at the rate of knots in your hand, and I was really hopeful that this would translate when it was used internally … nope!
I don’t have children, I would say I have pretty good vaginal muscles, but they couldn’t exactly crack nuts … so why does this fucking finger keep stopping when it’s inside me? Am I overworking it? Does it just need a rest? it certainly seems that way, because it stops and starts sometimes without any movement, anywhere from me. Yes it hits my G-Spot, I think ‘ooh that feels quite good …’ then it goes on a rest break – incredibly frustrating!
I haven’t even got round to telling you about the injuries I sustained whist trying to masturbate with this thing. There’s a gap between the finger head and the handle of about 6 or 7mm, and when this thing is thrusting back and forwards, the gap opens and shuts … and it doesn’t care a jot what’s in the way when it does! Whilst I’m busying myself trying to find a position and a way to hold this contraption so it doesn’t keep stopping, it’s planning an attack on my skin! It caught the pad on my ring finger, and the fleshy part on the bottom of the palm of my hand – and it really pinches! I’m sorry, but this is dangerous! I would hope that it shouldn’t be able to snag on my labia, but it’s on my mind all the time I’m using it, which stops me relaxing. It needs to be encased in a silicone sleeve or something, to cover this nipping, biting gap!
If Lovehoney make improvements to this, it needs to be powerful enough to be able to work internally, that gap needs to be covered, and to be honest, the noise level could be improved on. I genuinely believe, if this had been made by another brand and bought in by Lovehoney, they would’ve stopped selling it by now, they’ve discontinued much better toys in the past! It started life as some sort of pumpkin carver, and sadly I think it should’ve stayed that way! It’s just awful. I’m sorry Lovehoney, I still love you, but this thing is fit for the bin …
The ROCKBOX Finger was sent to me for free by Lovehoney in exchange for an honest and unbiased review. This does not alter my thoughts or experiences in any way, and all opinions are my own. Affiliate links have been used in this post.
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